Is the Truth Over-rated?

Written by Eileen Wacker

As parents, my husband and I have always insisted that telling the truth is critical. It is one of our most important rules. No lying. Lying is a sure way to get your phone taken away or earn some other dreaded consequence. But now that my four kids are teens and tweens, I want them to stop telling ‘their truths’ sometimes. Keep things in a thought bubble instead.

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Last night, we decided to go to a local restaurant for dinner. I quickly changed into a casual sundress. My oldest daughter, Olivia, asked, “Are you going to wear that?” I almost responded, “No, I just put this on for fun. I’m going back into my closet and put on the outfit I’m really going to wear. This is my trial outfit.” This would only earn me a remark like, “Did you really say ‘outfit’? Really Mom? No one says that. Not one person.” Then I would be a dinosaur in a lame dress. She was not neutralized by my silence. She went on. “Ethan, do you see what mom is wearing? She’s wearing the nightgown again.”

I protested, “This is a sundress. It’s not a nightgown.” They ignored me and tween Ethan chimed in, “Yah. And she’s wearing the nightgown with a blanket.” I’m insulted. “It is not a blanket! It’s a sweater.” They start laughing. “Mom, sorry but you’re wearing a nightgown with a sweater blanket.”

In the restaurant, my tween daughter, Natalie grabbed my hand and looked at me earnestly. “Mom, your hair is about eight different colors. You need to fix it.” I took my hand back before she could see my bitten cuticles. I ordered a glass of wine. My teen daughter Olivia said, “You’re going to end up in jail if you drink that and that would be so embarrassing for me. Plus, I need a ride to Jen’s party this weekend.”

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

Then my teen son Christian said, “No offense but…” I cut off his sentence because I don’t want to hear the rest of it. Inevitably what’s coming next is something negative. He had already said, “I’m just saying…” after making the observation, “That dress makes you look a little big.” I yelled at him for using poor grammar (‘little big’ is not a phrase) and made a mental note to never wear this dress again.

I don’t take it personally. Anyone can be the subject of their ‘observations’. My husband and I went to Napa for our anniversary. My parents came out and stayed with the kids. Everyone allegedly had an amazing time while we were gone.

But last night during the dinner, Natalie said, “to be honest, I think Grampy has to work on a few things.”

Ethan agreed, “Grampy is really fun and we love him but he breaks promises. You need to tell him we can see PG 13 movies. He promised to take us to the movies and then we didn’t go.”

Natalie said, “That would make him the oldest liar in the world and I don’t think he wants to be that.” Wow, tough crowd. She nonchalantly bit her mozzarella stick as I winced under her truth. Because she’s right. My dad would never, ever want to be thought of as the oldest liar in the world.

No one is safe from teens’ and tweens’ observations. They had a conversation about two iconic figures. Their opinion was Justin Timberlake is old and they had never heard of Clint Eastwood. The only connection they made is that both have trees as part of their names. And they thought this was hilarious.

Why do they tell the truth about my mommy flaws? They are constantly evasive about their own situations. I asked if anyone was sneaking electronics into his or her bed. I asked my son if he followed up with a teacher over a bad grade to see what can be done. I asked my other son how he ended up at a night beach party. “I don’t know what happened. We just ended up there.” I asked, “So you blinked your eyes and all of a sudden there was sand under your feet.” Blank looks were the response to all my queries. My sweater blanket had become a wet blanket.

Then it dawned on me. They tell the truth about my mommy flaws because they love me. This is their teenage way of teasing me, of trying to be funny. They are including me. I’m in the circle. And we are laughing and hanging out as a family.

Driving home, there was a fight over a song on the radio. I felt like my head might explode. I called Olivia a pill. She countered, “Did you hear what mom said?” Of course everyone heard what I said. We are all sitting together in the car. That’s the set up line. Because the follow up was, “Mom said I‘m acting like a pill! Hah! A pill! As if a pill acts like anything!” Then they all laughed so hard I thought we might drive off the road. I laughed too, treasuring this as a fun and memorable night.

How to Make Back to School Fun For Everyone

As it does every year, the summer has flown by and it is already time for kids to be going back to school. Although the summer months coming to a close is always disappointing, for many parents sending their kids back to school is not quite as bittersweet! What can be chaotic, however, is making that transition from a summer routine back into a school routine.

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

For children, the end of summer can be a sad time and for those who are nervous about going to school, it can also be quite anxiety provoking. However, there are some ways that parents can ease anxiety and keep the fun going even as the summer winds down. Keeping kids positive and happy about the start of school makes the transition from a summer routine easier for everyone involved. 

Mommy Blogger and writer for MadameNoire, Tanvier Peart, gives some of her best advice for how parents can make the most of the end of summer and get their kids back on track for school. 

1. Make back to school shopping an exciting event

Finding new clothes and checking off all the supplies on their seemingly endless school supplies list can be a hassle and sometimes end up as a source of stress if the kids are not enthused about the trip. By trying to make it a really exciting event that signifies back to school and getting new stuff, it will pump kids up and most likely make them more pleasant shopping companions- and make the expedition run a lot more smoothly in general. 

2. Talk up their grade

Making the grade your child is about to go into sound really cool and exciting will most likely ease some of the anxiety or dread of the upcoming first day of school and make kids proud to be getting older and moving up in school. 

3. Host an end of summer bash or cookout

Ending the summer with a really fun neighborhood get together or cookout with family and friends will give the whole family something to look forward to and make the last bit of summer really count. 

In addition to a cookout, host a family game night or camp out in the backyard. 

4. Create a stylish homework station

Every student, from kindergarteners to high schoolers, need a quiet space to do their homework every day after school- so use this time to find the best spot in the house to dub the homework station, whether it is in the child’s room, an office, or a corner in the kitchen. Then, make it fun by decorating the station and adding some stylish supplies. Have the kids help you to get them more excited too and make homework as fun as homework can be!

5. Create a fall activities calendar 

For kids who are really bummed about the end of summer, it is important to remind them that just because summer is ending doesn’t mean that the fun stops. Create a fall activities list or calendar to show kids all the fun activities there are to do in the fall, even when they’ve gone back to school. This list might help to ease your end-of-summer-blues, as well! 

Parents! Let us know: How do you make back to school time fun for your kids? 

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

Mommy Blogger Michelle Horton’s 10 Truths About Kids’ Birthday Parties

“Mom.me” blogger Michelle Horton has broken the silence by finally saying what every parent has been thinking about their kid’s birthday parties but has never said out loud. For kids, their birthdays as well as their friends’ birthdays are super exciting events that they can’t get enough of- the cake, the goody bags, the candy, the other little kids running around everywhere, it’s like kid heaven. As a parent, you feel like you’re obligated to look forward to your kid’s birthday, it’s their special day right? The day they came into the world and changed yours. But after their 1st birthday has come and gone and the parties just keep getting more complicated with more and more kids on the guest list, it can start to feel a little more stressful than exciting. Sometimes birthday parties aren’t even fun for the kids, hurt feelings can come from no-shows or missing invites, but as Michelle points out- every year parents keep going to them and keep hosting them. Despite the fact that, like Christmas madness, parents are never going to stop throwing their kids birthday parties- they are all going to keep thinking the same things. Here are Michelle Horton’s 10 Hard Truths about kids' birthday parties:

1. No parent wants to go, and no parent wants you to come.

It’s not personal. You seem perfectly lovely at school pick-up, and given a more comfortable atmosphere (somewhere without a head-splitting noise volume, and a few less hollers for “MOMMY”) maybe we could have a real conversation. But birthday parties are awkward, across the board. After huddling together with parents we barely know, making chitchat, silently pleading that our kid isn’t the one who collapses into a sugar-induced heap of tears or punches someone in the throat, we all leave grateful that it’s over, host and guests alike. Especially for the socially awkward amongst us, birthday parties are something to endure.

2. Half the guest list will RSVP the night before

When it comes to kids’ birthday parties, RSVP basically means nothing. You’re just going to have to accept it. Then parents will profusely apologize, as if they were the only one. A handful won’t respond at all, as if we won’t prepare a goodie bag and account for pizza just in case you phone in a last-minute response. At least one will cancel the day of, happens every time.

3. Prepare for siblings to come, because they will.

Don’t act surprised when a car unloads with four kids under 5, even though you only invited the one. Don’t you dare mentally count the pizza slices and goodie bags in your head; you were waiting for this moment. You’ve got this.

4. The activities you have spent so much time planning actually suck.

Musical chairs sounds fun until the first losing kid erupts into tears, elbowing kids off their seats. Scavenger hunts seem easy, until one older sibling goes on a prize-finding bender and refuses to share his winnings. If you can make it through two hours without saying, THAT’S IT, EVERYONE IN A CIRCLE AND SIT ON YOUR HANDS, then congratulations. Success.

5. Pinterest is for parents, not kids.

No kid cares about the themed food, Pinterest-inspired tablescape or décor. All of those printable tags and DIY touches? Just admit it, that’s for the camera (or maybe for other moms), not the kids. Kids want three things: sugar, loose balloons and space to run mad. Call it a day, folks. Let’s not overthink things.

6. Piñatas are the worst idea ever, stop it now.

Every time a parent emerges with a bat and the promise of candy, breaths catch in the air. Looks are exchanged around the room, silently saying, “Brace for catastrophe.” If the kids are strong enough to do some serious damage to the furniture, or to another kid’s skull, retire the piñata. The other parents thank you.

7. Goodie bags never make it out of the car.

So don’t try so hard. Kids are surprisingly easy to please.

8. All parents wish there was booze, too.

Wine would make this whole thing a lot easier, and less awkward. Sigh.

9. No one knows what to do about the gifts.

Do we open the presents in front of everyone? Do we wait? Do we avoid making eye contact with the presents?

 10. It’s never quite as bad as we anticipate.

Yes they are exhausting and awkward and, if parents are gonna be honest, way too expensive, but parents will still show up to the parties, gift in hand. They’ll still send out invitations, even if they “have to” invite the entire class. They’ll still go through the motions and get through the day, for the sake of the kids. And of course, for the birthday cake. 

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

MommyBlogger Elle Walker Creates Awesome Video for Her Childless Friends

For any Mom who has ever struggled to explain to their childless friends why they are bad texters or have “disappeared off the face of the earth” for a few weeks at a time- this is the perfect video for you! Youtube star and mother of two, Elle Walker, created a humorous and spot-on video of why she is sometimes “flakey” in the eyes of her friends without kids. Walker is a viral mommyblogger, quickly becoming a superstar through her insightful, funny, and accurate videos on her Youtube channel, “WhatsUpMoms”. 

The video was originally made as a creative way to apologize to her friends for being slow to text back or not answering phone calls instead of making the same old excuses- but since being put on the web it has gained a tremendous amount of popularity since so many moms can totally relate!

Click below to watch the hilarious video by Elle Walker: To my Friends Without Kids

How Mommy Bloggers Are Taking Over Social Media

The domination of men within the world of all things technology is slowly declining as more and more women are integrating technology, specifically social media, into their daily routines- at home and within the workplace. Today the number of women using social media in their day to day lives has reached 75%, versus 63% of men. 

Women of all ages and careers are a growing influence within social media, but one group in particular is beginning to stand out- a group affectionately dubbed "Mommy Bloggers". This term, one we are VERY fond of here at ONCEkids, describes female parents who use social media to reach out to other mothers, ranging from stay-at-home moms to moms balancing work and kids. This demographic has become extremely large as well as influential, and it only continues to grow each day. As of today, there are approximately 3.9 million of these Mommy Bloggers in North America, a number that can only be expected to get larger over time!

Giving everything from parenting and marriage advice to revealing funny or inspirational stories about their own triumphs and challenges, these mothers are here to offer unconditional support and say "Hey, you're not alone in this- we get it!"

 Anyone who has ever had a child knows that being a parent is a never ending job and, though rewarding, can be very challenging and even sometimes isolating. So being able to go online and read about other women who have had the exact same things happen to them and have faced similar dilemmas can be very comforting. 

Many of the blog sites are interactive, so women can not only read about other mothers, but get a chance to chat with them too! Mommy bloggers have given confidence and a voice to mothers everywhere, reminding them that we are all in this together. 

To learn more about Modern Moms and The Mom Code, please visit ONCEKids Publishing website, Facebook and Twitter

Are Mothers Out-Social-Media-ing Their Kids?

With 2013 upon us, it is seeming more and more like moms now aren't just jumping on the social media train -- but beginning to revolutionize how it's done. Social networking has become so much more than just a place for moms to keep an eye on their technology-addicted children. 

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In recent years, it has instead developed into a place for mothers to connect with other mothers, share their experiences and struggles, and even start up successful businesses. 

Much to their children's surprise (and often dismay), mothers have actually shown to be above average smartphone users, and the number of mothers owning smartphones is rapidly increasing. With 54% of mothers now owning a smartphone, it has surpassed the 50% of all mobile users in the United States. So that means that more moms are smartphone users than any other group in the U.S.! And smartphones aren't the only thing our tech-savvy moms are using. 

Moms are also showing tremendous skill in the social media world. Three out of four mothers reported visiting Facebook in one month, and even better news to our ears -- studies show that moms are 38% more likely to follow an online blog or become a "fan" of a webpage than any other group. 

Learn more about acclaimed author and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker, click here.

Nearly five million moms across America are a member or visitor of Pinterest -- making up more than a third of unique visitors in a single month! Social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest are attracting a large population of mothers, but what these women are really dominating is the world of blogging. 

Now, one out of every three bloggers is a mommy-blogger! This news could not be more exciting to us at ONCEKids, where we are all about the expansion of mommy-blogging. Simply googling "Moms in Social Media" or "Mommy-bloggers" will bring you to countless online blog sites where moms post their own personal blogs or feature other mother's blogs about balancing their career with their kids as well as their marriage and the stresses and triumphs that maintaining such a balance brings- a subject that no one could understand better than other mothers. 

Powerful Moms in Social Media (Part 5 of 5)

Dawn Meehan

Social media has become more and more integrated into our society. People all over the world are activating Facebook accounts, joining Twitter, and creating or following personal blog pages. Even businesses are jumping on the social media train, using sites like Twitter to increase their fan-base and connect with customers. But the group that seems to be rising to the top of the social media world is mothers. Mothers everywhere are dominating Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, and more with their advice and mixture of series and humorous stories of balancing work, marriage, and life with motherhood. 


Learn more about acclaimed author and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker, click here.

More and more mommy bloggers are popping up online, but Working Mother has selected fifteen women whose talents for social networking have gotten them national -- and sometimes international- attention. We started with Queen Moms, then Modern Moms, Mompreneurs and Mommy Mavens.  Four women conclude the list of the most powerful social media moms, Dawn Meehan, Amy Oztan, and "dream team" Lisa Stone and Jory Des Jardins.

Amy Oztan

Dawn Meehan has become one of the most popular mommy bloggers in the social media world thanks to her witty blog Because I Said So, which describes life raising her six children. Her blog has grabbed attention for its witty charm, but also because of her occasional highly personal and touching posts, like one about her husband leaving her and another about two of her children being hospitalized for depression. Powerful blogs like these helped her gain the Best Parenting Blog nomination by the Blogger's Choice Awards in 2008. Meehan says her goal of her blogs is to "let other parents out there know that they aren't alone. I want to remind moms that we all experience the daily struggles, chaos, and joys of childrearing." Dawn Meehan has become an inspirational voice in the message that mothers are not alone and how important it is to support one another and use the struggles and triumphs of motherhood to connect to each other.

Has your family received a Nook, Kindle or iPad this year?  Find Fujimini Adventure Series award-winning books here.  Great family-friendly gifts.

Amy Oztan's blogging career, which she describes as "totally accidental", has grown into much more than a personal hobby. This mommy blogger has changed the face of the digital media community through her surprising level of advertisement on her blog page. She offers full disclosure regarding her compensation by the companies she writes for. This choice has received a mixture of criticism and applause from businesses and the community. She became inspired to take her blog writing from business to personal with her blog Selfish Mom. Her purpose of this blog is to offer busy parents a full and brutally honest product review. Her honesty, along with her unwavering sense of humor, has gathered quite a bit of attention- and landed this mother of two on the list of most powerful social media moms. 

Lisa Stone, Jory Des Jardins

To learn more about Modern Moms and The Mom Code, please visit ONCEKids Publishing website, Facebook and Twitter

Our next social media mommy bloggers come in a pair. Lisa Stone and Jory Des Jardins are the founders of the very popular blog, BlogHer. These mommy bloggers are especially prevalent to our list because they starting blogging before it was cool. In 2004, the pair launched a site dedicated to building a community for women. Since then it hosts over 3,000 blogs and has more than 34 million hits a month. Wow!  BlogHer is also unique because in addition to its blog page, it also organizes conferences for other women bloggers. Since its beginning, BlogHer has built its way up to becoming the seventh largest blog network in the world! That is quite an accomplishment for these two moms (as well as for their third partner, Elisa Camahort Page who is not yet a mother!) 

Powerful Moms in Social Media (Part 4 of 5)

Ann Handley

The popularity and influence of social media has been increasing rapidly, but a new group is stepping forward on top. Mommy bloggers are taking over the social media scene on all fronts -- Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, as well as personal blogs. Working Mother has constructed a list to acknowledge the mothers whose tremendous talent for social networking has set them apart from the rest. We have begun, continued and expanded upon these mothers' work. These fifteen women have influenced large audiences and powerful companies all over with their witty and heartfelt blogs about balancing work and motherhood.

To learn more about Modern Moms and The Mom Code, please visit ONCEKids Publishing website, Facebook and Twitter

Ann Handley is what Working Mother refers to as the "social media and technology guru." This mother of two has changed the business world through her blog MarketingProfs Daily Fix. She assists companies making the jump into the social media world by providing them with online media marketing strategies and putting together online content. MarketingProfs Daily Fix has been featured in the top 20 of Advertising Age's Power 150. In addition to her hugely successful marketing blog, her Twitter page has over 104,000 followers and another personal blog! Her personal blog, Anarchy, focuses on family life. She tells stories and gives advice about parenting, balancing a busy work schedule, marriage and more. 

Beth Kanter

It is hard not to be impressed with our next mommy blogger. Beth Kanter's achievements have earned her the titled of one of the most influential women in technology and has been named by BusinessWeek one of the "Voices of Innovation for Social Media." Her Twitter has accumulated a staggering 407,000+ followers and her blog is one of the longest standing online nonprofit sources to date. Her blog, BethKanter.org, deals with online marketing services- and this is only an extension of her real career. The inspiration behind her blog and Twitter account is her company, Zoetica. Zoetica provides nonprofit companies with online marketing services. Kanter says that the secret to a successful work life as well as being a checked-in mother for her three sons is to know when to step back and take a break from the Internet and technology. 

Katie Allison Granju

Learn more about acclaimed author and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker, click here

Many of the mommy bloggers present a witty account on the struggles and successes of balancing life, work, and motherhood- but our next social media mom, brings something new to the table. Katie Allison Granju bears her soul on her blog Mama Pundit, touching on some of the more rarely discussed topics such as divorce and miscarriages. Her brutal honesty has gotten a lot of attention from readers, especially those who feel like they can connect with her heart breaking story. In 2010, one of her six children died from a drug overdose. As a method of coping, as well as raising awareness, she poured her heart out in her blog. Her blog is creating a new wave of helping mothers to feel connected with one another and aware that they are not alone during their struggles. In addition to her blog, Granju has started the Henry Louis Granju Memorial Scholarship Fund. This works towards providing funds for families struggling to pay the expenses of drug and alcohol treatment for their children. She also works in the social media department for the t.v. network HGTV.

To re-visit any of the past Powerful Moms series, click here for Part 1, Part 2, Part 3.

Powerful Moms in Social Media (Part 3 of 5)

Ciaran Blumenfeld 

Working Mother has put together a list of fifteen women who can be called the "most powerful" mommy bloggers in social media to date. Previously we showcased the first and second set of mothers.  This third showcase continues to honor mothers.  Their voices are being heard across multiple social media platforms, including Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and their own personal blog pages. In addition to all being powerful-influencers reaching large audiences of regular people as well as big companies, these women all have another thing in common- they all have at least one child under the age of eighteen.

To learn more about Modern Moms and The Mom Code, please visit ONCEKids Publishing website, Facebook and Twitter

The list continues with mommy blogger number seven, Ciaran Blumenfeld. This social media powerhouse has racked up over 51,000 followers on Twitter, in addition to starting Momfluential.net, a social networking site dedicated to mom-friendly blog posts and other content. Her blog and other ventures into the social media world inspired her to take her ideas further, leading to the creation of her children's clothing line, Francie Pants.  Blumenfeld has her hard work and dedication to thank for her climb up the mommy blogger ladder, but also her four children. She says the "boom of blogging and birth of social networking was well timed with the arrival of my four kids. As a work at home mom, it was a pleasure to connect with other in similar situations. Sharing my knowledge and experiences with other parents has been a fabulous adventure."

Brooke Burke

The next most powerful mom on the list is Brooke Burke. She is known mostly for hosting the popular t.v. show Dancing With the Stars, but that's not what landed her number 8 for most powerful mommy bloggers. While her 1.81 million followers on her personal Twitter is admirable, it's her 121,000 followers on her blog's Twitter page that has us impressed. The mother of four is the creator of Modern Mom, a blog that covers everything from celebrity moms to children's books. In addition to that, she also owns Baboosh Baby, which sells mom necessities. In 2010 Burke expressed the importance of having communication with your kids, such as letting them know what you're doing, when you'll be home, and stressing that you will always be back. She says dialogue with your kids is the most important component of being a successful working mother. 

Ree Drummond

Learn more about acclaimed author and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker, click here 

The next mom on the list takes social media powerhouse to a new level. Ree Drummond, also a mother of four, has even gotten some celebrity attention for her blog titled The Pioneer Woman. She blogs about her life, which has been thought of as so interesting it is rumored Reese Witherspoon is being sought out to play Drummond in a movie. Her blog talks about how she was a self-proclaimed party girl in L.A. until her life turned upside down when she packed up everything and moved to Oklahoma to marry a cattle rancher. This adventure inspired her to begin her blog in 2006 about motherhood, her family, and her life on the ranch. Her story caught on, and quickly. Since its creation, her number of visits per day has gone up to over 22.3 million page views a month in addition to 4.4 million unique visits. Her Twitter page boasts over 231,000 followers and it has been reported that she makes about $1 million from ad revenue per year. She is the author of a cookbook and a novel, titled From Black Heels to Tractor Wheels, which landed number two on the New York Times Best Seller List in 2011. The Pioneer Woman has won three different honors at the Weblog Awards, one in 2007, one in 2008, and one in 2009. Also in 2009 she took the top prize has the Weblog of the Year. That is one successful mommy blogger!

Return back to see both our first set of honored mothers and our second set of proud working Mothers.