Family Road trips: Good and Not-So-Good

Written by Guest Blogger Schelle Lenssen

An old proverb talks about “a journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step.” My new spin on this classic wisdom is “a family road trip of 500 miles begins with the toddler throwing up in the back seat.” It certainly doesn't have the same ring to it, does it? But pretty or not, it's exactly how we kicked off the summer travel season.

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Every Memorial Day weekend, our family’s tradition is to travel to a cabin near Yellowstone National Park. Most years, this is one of our favorite vacations and we have accumulated many happy and fun memories after nearly a decade of trips. Unfortunately, as can happen when traveling with kids, we also have some not-so-great memories. When our oldest was a baby, we rushed her to Urgent Care when her fever got scary. Two years later, we called the Poison Control Center when she discovered, and sampled, a box of mouse poison. We've had vehicle issues, been caught in snowstorms, and now can add "cleaned up vomit on the roadside" to that ever-growing list of near-disastrous events.

Looking back on all the things that went wrong over the years (and almost caused me to lose my temper or sanity), it would be easy to just cancel the trip. But we don't. We truly love that tiny spot of paradise in the mountains. My husband and I thoroughly enjoy sitting next to each other on a boat, fishing for trophy trout while our daughters get spoiled back at the cabin by their grandparents and whatever aunts and uncles made the trip. Our little girls collect wildflowers, explore streams, and talk to tiny baby bison. Our oldest daughter sometimes comes fishing and when she caught her first fish a few years ago, I could actually see her confidence and strength build with every turn of the reel. These are the reasons we keep going back year after year. A little bit of vomit from the youngest isn't going to stop us. All the memories we make on this summer adventure – good and bad – become part of our collective family history.

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The rest of our summer is nearly all planned out. A collection of overnight camps, day camps, local Vacation Bible Schools, and sports camps will see us rushing from activity to activity. We’ve also got plenty of time for blanket forts, sidewalk chalk murals, backyard camping, and family water fights. New swimsuits and flip-flops are waiting, ready to be worn for days on end. Summer certainly doesn’t have the same structure and routine of the school year, and we try to embrace that whimsy and make the most of it. Although, if the two-year old could keep her stomach healthy and not vomit in the backseat for the remainder of the summer, that would be great too.

Mom's Code Chronicle #6 Survival Tips for this time of Year

Written by Eileen Wacker

Every year at this point in time, I’m just trying to survive the end of the school year. Intellectually, I know the big bang of stress and crushing amount of must do’s are coming, but I still get caught unaware. My four kids are exhausted so I’m dragging everyone to the finish line. There are field days, class parties, end of year tests and projects, sports celebrations and more. I’m holding out hope for a strong finish, even as mounting evidence indicates that they are melting down.

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Part of my survival strategy is kicking some cans down the road. What gets pushed out is my fabulous get ready for summer diet and cute dresses to go with it, working out, organizing the house, me time, catching up on work. I work from home for flexibility but there is no barrier and all the chaos leaks in continuously. Bottom line, all my stuff gets pushed because I can’t push off getting all the items on the packing list for the sports broadcasting program, the tennis camp, the basketball and acting camp. The average number of items on each packing list is 42. It’s not drop off sun screen with a water bottle; it’s sheets, towels, footwear, shirts, shorts, swimsuits, hats, medical forms, risk clearance and countless other items.

I recognize and accept to some degree that summertime has now become about being strategic. It’s not all ice cream and bicycle rides; they have to get scheduled in. There is no way around it. Tutors for standardized tests, relatives fighting for the little precious time, summer school, sports and acting camps, and volunteer projects for each child to the degree possible. This year we have an 80^th birthday party, a high school graduation, a college graduation, a cousin’s wedding, a one-year old that we have not met. Every relative from both sides of the family lobbies for us to come. We try but it’s never enough and I have to avoid feeling guilty that someone feels short changed and someone always does.

So how do I survive?

1   1)   My family is almost too tired to celebrate, but I insist we do. Because we have to. We are running so fast that we have to stop and reflect, even for a moment and recognize the accomplishment. So I’ll go to my little girl’s favorite restaurant and let her order the cheese fries and mac and cheese, even as my bathing suit self protests.
 
      The Moms Code author Eileen Wacker also writes the acclaimed childrens books The Fujimini Adventure Series.  Many proud parents just like you appreciate multi-cultural education for your children.  Find the book series by clicking here. 

2   2)   I make an agreement with my kids that I will try to say yes as much as I can but each one of them has to be nice and appreciative. No fighting and complaining. I tell them, “You want the one off ride to the beach, movie, friend’s house, pool, mall or wherever, make it charming for me in the car.”

    3)   I pull out little happiness tricks. For example, I’ll wake my little girl up with a Starbucks run or put a $10 itunes card on my son’s pillow. Whatever small item I can think of. I do this for teachers and coaches so I do it for my children as well.

4

 4)   I find a small window to see my girl group and also the female relatives I’m close to over the summer. Engaging in meaningful discussions that have nothing to do with the advancement of any one or anything is cleansing and feels like a cold glass of wine on a summer’s night. We all understand that we are venting and would not change out our reality for anything. Our souls know each other and it’s wonderful to reconnect.

5   5)   I vow to stay nice to my husband who is honestly a good guy, when he says, “How long are you gone? What about the dogs? Everyone is abandoning me to have a fun summer while I work like a mule. I can’t take care of dogs.” I just smile, make some arrangements, and continue to text him heart emojis while I’m gone.

Congratulations to all the moms who are surviving yet another year end and into the summer cycle.

10 Strategies For Surviving a Family Road Trip

The end of July and August are the most popular times of the year for parents to take time off from work and go on a vacation with their family. However, this doesn’t mean that every family will be flying to their destinations (which opens up a host of its own challenges)- but for many families, this means a road trip. Perhaps road trips were fun and exciting when you were 22 and going with all your friends, but some parents would call a road trip with all your children in a packed car something out of a horror movie.

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

No matter what, the road trip probably won’t be an experience you would call amazingly fun and exciting or something you’ll want to do again right away, but there are strategies you can take to ease some of the stress and chaos and make the trip at least bearable. Some of these strategies involve planning and completion ahead of time, and the others are for when the road trip is in progress. 

For the days leading up to the road trip:

1. Check the weather

Bad weather can make a road trip extra stressful, even without kids, so put a car full of kids and bad weather together and you’ve got yourself a nightmare road trip. At the beginning of the week be sure to check the weather forecast and see how the weather is going to be on the day of your trip. If it is going to pour, leave a day earlier or leave the day after you planned because, I promise, it is not worth it to drive through a storm in order to be there on schedule. 

2. Pack a cooler of easy to eat and not too messy snacks

Emphasis on the not too messy part! Having a cooler filled with snacks and refreshments will keep kids from wanting to make unnecessary stops or continuously whining that they are hungry. And they are there for when you get hungry too! Great road trip snacks include goldfish, apple slices, cheese, and juice boxes. 

3. Perfect your “you better stop doing what you’re doing” face 

Having the ability to communicate your expectations with a single look is an art that seems to be perfected by mothers. This skill becomes extra important when you’re up in the passenger seat or driving and can’t take your eyes off the road for longer than a split second- or when you just don’t have the energy to yell or lecture. Bonus points for being able to do it in the rearview mirror!

4. Charge all electronics

This one is super important because if the technology and entertainment dies and the children are bored- you’ll be the one paying for it! The night before the road trip, make sure that all portable DVD players, kindles, iPads, cell phones, ect are plugged in and charging.

5. Make sure headphones are packed 

Not only make sure some headphones are packed, make sure enough headphones for each child are packed because, trust me, you do not want the kids fighting over who gets to use them. Forgetting headphones would also mean that you have to listen to their movies or music the whole ride too instead of your own, and that will probably put a damper on the trip.

For when the road trip is in progress:

1. Don’t stress

This may sound impossible, but try as best you can to not get overwhelmed and let the little things bother you. The trip will probably not go entirely as planned or be easy every second, but it is important to go with the flow! Remember, you are on your way to your vacation!  

2. Forget about potty training: bring extra diapers

Even if your toddler is doing a pretty good job with their potty training or fully potty trained, forget the lessons and just throw on a diaper or pull-up. You’ll be glad you did when your 20 miles from the nearest rest stop and your child says they need to go like, immediately. 

3. Master the art of peeing on the side of the road (for you or the kids…)

Sometimes rest stops can be few and far between, and every parent knows when a child has to go to the bathroom, they cannot wait. For those of you who have children too old to put a diaper on, get ready to have to pull over. From what I have read, the best thing to do is pull over so your car is completely off the road, on top of a hill if possible to decrease visibility, open both passenger side doors, and have your child stand or squat between the doors. If your child doesn’t feel comfortable doing that- they are just gonna have to get over it or hold it!

4. Do your best to ignore them

Kids and long car rides do not mix well. They are probably going to annoy the heck out of you at certain points, but do your best to resist giving in or lashing out because that will just make things worse. Just put in your favorite CD, turn it up, and tune them out! 

5. Have some “road trip games” ready

The classic road trip games may have lost their popularity since the increase in technology, but they can still be a great bonding experience and provide some technology-free entertainment. If the kids are in a good mood, and you’re in a good mood, give some of these road trip games a try. 

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

28 Summer Bucket List Ideas for Your Family

Every summer at the beginning of June it feels like we have endless time ahead of us, but without fail, every year August rolls around and we hear ourselves saying, “where did the time go?”

One of the best ways to make sure you don’t let the summer fly by without doing any of the fun activities you wanted is to make a Summer Bucket List. At the very beginning of summer, sit down with the family and make a list of all the activities you want to accomplish and places you want to visit that summer. Then make sure to hang the list up in a place where you’ll see it everyday, like on the fridge. Not only writing it all out on a list but also hanging it up as a daily reminder will help you keep track of what you’re accomplishing and not let the days get away from you. It can also serve as a reference for those rainy days when the family is bored and looking for something to do. 

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

Have the summer you always say you’re going to have when June rolls around, while you still have plenty of time left! To help you get started, we asked real moms for some ideas straight from their own summer bucket lists.

1. Go strawberry picking

2. Set up a lemonade stand with the kids 

3. Have a family water balloon fight

4. Explore a part of town your family has never been to

5. Have at least one family picnic (complete with straw baskets and everything!)

6. Go for a family bike ride

7. Have a family cook off or bake off on a rainy day 

Make two teams, one with mom as the coach and one with dad, and then compete against each other to see who can make the better meal or dessert.

8. Host a BBQ for your family and friends

9. Go on a family nature walk and learn about the plants and birds

10. Have a family game night complete with snacks and prizes

11. Catch fireflies

12. Visit your local farmer’s market

13. Run (or walk) a 5K race with your family

14. Take the kids to a drive-in theater

15. Go camping (even if its just in your backyard)

16. Make a slip-n-slide in your own backyard

17. Make a fire and roast marshmallows

18. Volunteer with your family for a local charity

19. Visit a park you’ve never been to

20. Go to the zoo and teach the kids all about the different animals 

21. Start a garden with your children as helpers

22. Make up your own holiday and celebrate it as a family

23. Do arts and crafts outside as a family 

24. Make homemade snow cones with the kids

25. Teach the kids how to fish

26. Play flashlight tag or ghost in the graveyard with all your neighbors (yes this includes the adults too!)

27. Go for a family bike ride

28. Go kayaking 

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

Moms Guide to Having a Real Vacation This August

Every mother knows that once kids are in the picture, the word "summer vacation" has an entire new meaning. Lying on the beach, margarita in hand, sleeping the day away, romantic dinners for two, and a couples massage, seem to become a distant memory replaced with child-proofed hotels, family-friendly restaurants, a shovel and pale in hand instead of your favorite book, and a much-less than spontaneous agenda. So does that mean that for the next 12 years or so, your "vacation" is going to be…not a vacation at all? 

Though there isn't really any way around some of the changes that are going to happen to your trips after kids are in the mix, there are some strategies to help make your time away from home stress-free and enjoyable for everyone involved. 

1. First, try to stick to your normal routine as much as possible

Even though you aren't home, deriving too much from your structured routine is an invitation for some unwanted behaviors. If dinner is normally at six, dragging little ones out to a fancy restaurant at seven or eight is just asking for disaster. It would be easier and less stressful for both you and the kids to just do an easy dinner of pasta or pizza around their normal dinner time, and maybe something a little fancier for Mom and Dad once the kids are fed and settled. 

2. Don't try to cram too many activities into one day

Everyone who has had little kids on a vacation knows that trying to fill up the entire day with activities can cause overstimulation and lead to possible meltdowns. Instead of trying to have an activity planned for every minute, pick one to focus on for that day. If you're going to go to the zoo, let that be the activity that the day revolves around. Although, planning ahead somewhat is advised- you're on vacation! Leave your rigid step-by-step agenda at home! Leaving room for flexibility allows you to enjoy your time more and be less stressed, making the trip 
more pleasant for everyone.

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3. Loosen up some of your restrictions

Tossing all the rules out the window will most likely lead to bad behavior or increased stress for you, but on vacation there is nothing wrong with making a few exceptions to normal at-home restrictions. Letting yourself be a little more carefree than you may usually be will help you to feel more relaxed and happy during your time off. So even if it's a little past bedtime, pop in that DVD and give them a little snack to unwind while you and Dad have a margarita and some grown up time. 

4. Unplug

Smart phones give us the ability to be constantly checked in, having access to our email, calendar, and notes at the touch of a button, which is great-except when you're on vacation. Key word here, vacation! New technology allows us to work even when we aren't sitting at a desk, but you've paid all this money and taken time off for a reason, to enjoy yourself. So as hard as it may be, put the phone, Ipad, laptop down and step away from work. Just unplug for the week, leave behind the stresses of home and work, and just enjoy relaxing and spending time with your family. 

Has your family received a Nook, Kindle or iPad this year?  Find Fujimini Adventure Series award-winning books here.  Great family-friendly gifts.