A Mom's Guide to Surviving the Stress of the Holidays

You’ve survived Friendsgiving parties and Thanksgiving dinners.  But now the whole crush of holiday activities soars forward until New Year’s — so many chances to make memories with your little ones and family.

BUT WARNING! Holiday stress can add to mom stress and build into a perfect storm for husband hysteria, child tantrums and even mom meltdowns.

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Check out tips for avoiding being overwhelmed and keeping the season fun—for you and your family!

Yes, of course this is the season of giving and expressing gratitude yet, we’re often so rushed trying to buy everyone their perfect gift or create their perfect meal that we feel exhausted by the end of it.

This year, as the holiday chaos begins, set aside some time to envision the memories you want to create this year. What sort of memories do you want your family to have this holiday season?”


When you’re trying to cook a meal or decorate the house with little ones underfoot, it can be challenging. Sometimes, you’re doing your best just not to ruin or break anything as you avoid tripping over toys in the kitchen.

Find ways to get your kids involved in the process. Ask them to help wrap presents, mix ingredients for a recipe, draw holiday cards, or come up with a silly play routine for their favorite holiday song. They’ll feel involved and proud that they could help with holiday activities.

In 2018, we’re lucky that kid-friendly holiday parties and events are popular.  They are great because they keep our kids busy and entertained for hours and usually make your kids tired and ready to nap (Yes!). But too many activities can leave your kids feeling more worn out and exhausted over time. It’s easy for babies to get overstimulated—and fussy—with all of the extra activity so you might want to be prepared to take baby to a quiet place during a party if needed. Decide what events are most important to you and make sure those happen. It’s important to make sure little ones are still getting enough sleep and eating well so they can enjoy this special time. Put family events and downtime on the calendar to ensure balance.

As moms we feel a lot of pressure to do it all, and to do it all by ourselves. For some of us, it’s uncomfortable to admit we need help, but allowing others to help us also creates a stronger network of social support. It’s reassuring to know there are other adults in our children’s lives whom we can trust.

And remember: You’re not the only mom who needs a break. Don’t forget you can always return the favor and offer to watch a friend’s children, too.

The most important thing at the holidays is to be kind to yourself and not beat yourself up for things you didn’t do, or that didn’t go exactly as planned. You’ll be late to activities, and everyone will understand. Your table might not look exactly like the Pinterest image you were aiming for, but your guests won’t even know.

January 2 will be here soon enough, and you’ll be back to a more normal routine. So, just like the baby years, remember that the during the holiday season the days are long but the months are short. Enjoy what you can and let the rest go.

Happy Holidays!

Thanksgiving Lesson: Can’t Judge a Person by Their Neighborhood

Written By

Kenna McHugh

“The love of family and the admiration of friends is much more important than wealth and privilege.” Charles Kuralt

When I was nine years old, my Girl Scout troop organized a Thanksgiving project sharing home cooked meals from four different nationalities. The project not only taught me about ethnic foods but it taught me you can’t always judge a person by their neighborhood.

Many proud parents just like you appreciate multi-cultural education for your children.  Find this award-winning book series by clicking here. 

We had Japanese, Chinese, Russian, and Mexican families who agreed to share their traditional meals. The troop leader organized a chart, so everyone knew where to go on which night during the month of November.

Teresa’s family was sponsoring the Mexican dinner. They lived in a neighborhood with low rise houses, the driveways overflowing with rusting pickup trucks and low riding cars. Truthfully, I was afraid to go to her home. I thought, her family and neighborhood were too dangerous.

The irony of my fear came from a project my mother arranged with my brother’s scout troop. She drove the scouts and me through the same neighborhood where Teresa lived. 

I sat in the front seat and looked out the passenger window as my mother slowly drove past abandon buildings with broken glass and crude graffiti “Kill Whites”, “Cop Killers” and “Bring destruction on your head!” There were other dirty words and swear words. Piles of litter sat against the buildings.

My mother said nothing and just drove. We viewed dilapidated houses, homeless people with shopping carts, adults passed out on benches and women in scanty outfits. I was terrified because I had never seen a poverty-stricken neighborhood.

When I found out Teresa was from the same neighborhood, I was afraid of her. I stayed away from her during the Girl Scout meetings.

Knowing I was to have Mexican food with her family petrified me. I worried for two weeks. I couldn’t beg out of it either because it was part of our troop’s badge project.

Learn more about The Moms Code and the tenets of being a happy Mom.

Two hours before I was to arrive at Teresa’s home for the Mexican dinner, I had a meltdown and called her. I told her I was sick and couldn’t make it.  My mom came home. “I am not going,” I cried.  My mom asked what was wrong, I told her my dilemma. “My life is in danger! They might poison me!”

My mom looked pensive and explained that even though Teresa lived in that poor neighborhood her family and home were safe. “Not all the streets and homes are like the ones we saw.”

Teresa’s family lived in a small, old house on a beautiful street with lots of trees. Their home was clean and comfortable. Teresa greeted me, and I apologized. She smiled and said she understood. She and her family were nice and friendly, and the meal was delicious. Not a Thanksgiving goes by where I don’t remember having that meal with Teresa’s family and what I learned. Don’t judge a person by their neighborhood. Feel thankful for friends; feel grateful for experiences; feel grateful for family.

Thanksgiving Traditions: Turkey, Pies and 'Thankful Tree'

Written by

Shelle Lenssen

All families have their own way of doing Thanksgiving and passing on traditions. Growing up, I thought my family's Thanksgiving Dinners were pretty typical. We'd have a big turkey with stuffing, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, and Jell-o salad. We'd go around the table and each say something we were thankful for, stuff ourselves silly and take a break to clear the table. Then, the assortment of pies would come out and the real eating would begin.

Learn more about The Moms Code and the tenets of being a happy Mom.

Sometime in my childhood, my dad decreed that on Thanksgiving, we would have the same number of pies as there were people at the table. That meant if it was just our 5-person family at dinner, there would be five pies, and we'd just keep adding pies as we added guests. The more people around the table, the more pies to choose from. Classic pies, such as apple and pumpkin, are always served. Cherry, blueberry, and pecan pies are also regular favorites. We've had various cream pies, custard pies, and my favorite, peanut butter pie. The number of pies really is ridiculous, but the tradition continues and no one complains. Guests leave with their own to-go box of pie slices and those remaining eat pie for breakfast for the next week.

My second-grade daughter is preparing for her class's annual Thankful Feast next week. The children are supposed to bring a food item that is traditional to their family's Thanksgiving meal. When talking with me about this project, my daughter was a little frustrated because she didn't think we had any unique Thanksgiving traditions. To her, a dessert table overflowing with pies was just something she'd seen her whole life and assumed other families did the same thing. She was pleasantly surprised to learn the abundance of pies was indeed unique to us and is happy to share this tradition with her class. Together, we’ll assemble 25 mini peanut butter pies and she’ll proudly pass them out and talk about her family’s Thanksgiving pie tradition.

Many proud parents just like you appreciate multi-cultural education for your children.  Find this award-winning book series by clicking here. 

While our pie tradition has been around longest, my husband and I are working to make other Thanksgiving attributes, such as gratitude, generosity, and service, part of our annual event as well. For the past three years, we’ve cut out a paper “Thankful Tree” and decorated it with leaves listing out the many things we’re thankful for. Everything from family members, pets, and friends to chocolate and favorite toys gets listed and by Thanksgiving our Thankful Tree is just as overcrowded at our pie table. We’re adding in a new service tradition this year and our family will be volunteering to fill the shelves at our local food bank. We’ve been talking with our kids about helping others and now it’s time we put words into action. As much as we enjoy our pie tradition, creating a heritage of gratitude and service is ultimately more rewarding.

Thanksgiving Traditions: Turkey, Pies and 'Thankful Tree'

Written by

Shelle Lenssen

All families have their own way of doing Thanksgiving and passing on traditions. Growing up, I thought my family's Thanksgiving Dinners were pretty typical. We'd have a big turkey with stuffing, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, and Jell-o salad. We'd go around the table and each say something we were thankful for, stuff ourselves silly and take a break to clear the table. Then, the assortment of pies would come out and the real eating would begin.

Learn more about The Moms Code and the tenets of being a happy Mom.

Sometime in my childhood, my dad decreed that on Thanksgiving, we would have the same number of pies as there were people at the table. That meant if it was just our 5-person family at dinner, there would be five pies, and we'd just keep adding pies as we added guests. The more people around the table, the more pies to choose from. Classic pies, such as apple and pumpkin, are always served. Cherry, blueberry, and pecan pies are also regular favorites. We've had various cream pies, custard pies, and my favorite, peanut butter pie. The number of pies really is ridiculous, but the tradition continues and no one complains. Guests leave with their own to-go box of pie slices and those remaining eat pie for breakfast for the next week.

My second-grade daughter is preparing for her class's annual Thankful Feast next week. The children are supposed to bring a food item that is traditional to their family's Thanksgiving meal. When talking with me about this project, my daughter was a little frustrated because she didn't think we had any unique Thanksgiving traditions. To her, a dessert table overflowing with pies was just something she'd seen her whole life and assumed other families did the same thing. She was pleasantly surprised to learn the abundance of pies was indeed unique to us and is happy to share this tradition with her class. Together, we’ll assemble 25 mini peanut butter pies and she’ll proudly pass them out and talk about her family’s Thanksgiving pie tradition.

Many proud parents just like you appreciate multi-cultural education for your children.  Find this award-winning book series by clicking here. 

While our pie tradition has been around longest, my husband and I are working to make other Thanksgiving attributes, such as gratitude, generosity, and service, part of our annual event as well. For the past three years, we’ve cut out a paper “Thankful Tree” and decorated it with leaves listing out the many things we’re thankful for. Everything from family members, pets, and friends to chocolate and favorite toys gets listed and by Thanksgiving our Thankful Tree is just as overcrowded at our pie table. We’re adding in a new service tradition this year and our family will be volunteering to fill the shelves at our local food bank. We’ve been talking with our kids about helping others and now it’s time we put words into action. As much as we enjoy our pie tradition, creating a heritage of gratitude and service is ultimately more rewarding.