Humans Are Lucky

Written by Eileen Wacker

Today like every day, I wake up and think, “I’m lucky. I’m happy. I’m not going to get mad at my husband, my four kids or our two dogs Buster Brown and Chewbacca (“Chewie”). But usually I’m fighting the urge to yell before breakfast is over. The morning routine never gets easier. I try to run a full inspection of clean teeth, hair and clothes, a dose of sunscreen, a refreshed water bottle, completed homework, and shoes. My son states, “I don’t have PE so I don’t need any shoes today.” I sigh, “Well, we’re shoe people. Get your sneakers!” Next, my daughter shows me video evidence of the puppy eating half of her homework. I jot a quick note to the teacher on the shredded sheet and tell my little girl to hand it in.  I wonder why she filmed it all happening without stopping it. I can hear her chuckling in the background of the video.

As I walk out in my exercise clothes, I feel a sense of accomplishment. I have not yelled at anyone. I’m not squinting my eyes in a menacing way either. Two kids have the right clothes and gear for the tennis tryouts after school. As I’m dropping three of the kids, my daughter looks up from her phone and announces, “I wish they had school buses in Hawaii so I could ride with my friends and not a bunch of losers!” My eye twitches.

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

I just spent an hour in traffic to drive eight miles to the school. In our family of six, we have more electronics than the FBI. All eyeballs and thumbs have been on their devices the whole ride. I don’t know where the loser comment is coming from. Since my kids consider all their content to be strictly classified and highly confidential, I pass on asking. Instead I wink at her and say, “Have a nice day, happiness hijacker.” She rolls her eyes, smiles and says, “I was just kidding. You too.”

After drop off, I squeeze in a hike. I love the views in Hawaii and they help me put things into perspective. Time slows down for that small window and I feel grateful. Then I’m ready to solve a million small issues thrown in my path. As a working mom, I’m in constant motion and always tired by the time I start the afternoon pick-ups.

Today, when I pick my son up from school, he asks, “Mom do you know how lucky we are? If we were predators we would have to run after our food to catch it every day. That would be very tiring. My friends and I think that the adults would get sick of chasing the fast running grown-ups and start to eat the unguarded babies. Would you do that? Also, imagine if there were lions at our school and we had to run our very fastest to class so we would not get eaten? We are so lucky to be humans. I like today.”

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I start to laugh. I’m energized. As I cook three different dinners on the stove for my particular eaters who need their food prepared in specific ways, I just smile, appreciating I did not have to catch it. Then I notice that there are no tigers in any closets waiting to take me out as I put the last bits of laundry away. I leave the day, despite all the machinations and challenges, with the same basic sentiments I started with. “I am happy that I don’t have to catch my food. I’m lucky to be a human. And, I’m not mad at anyone.”

Is Drop Off Etiquette Realistic?

Written by Eileen Wacker

It’s only a month into the new school year and I’m stressed out by the end of most days. Getting kids up and out in the morning is a grind. Yes, we lay our clothes out, have our backpacks in the entryway, have all the clothes, equipment, notebooks and other essentials ready for their million activities. I make a healthy breakfast for each of my four kids who get up the first time I say in my sweetest voice ever, “Good morning! It’s time to get up angels!”

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

I’M KIDDING! This never happens. It’s a gong show most mornings. If there is something in their stomachs and they are wearing shoes, it’s a pretty good start. The next goal is to get them to school on time with all the work they did actually in their backpacks. They fight over who sits where in the minivan and who positioned their backpack on purpose to touch the sibling’s leg. As we enter the rush hour traffic, my daughter announces that she wants to be a vegetarian. I apologize to her and tell her she will have to wait until college. It’s simply too inconvenient for a family of six to accommodate a vegetarian at this moment. Every one of them has some protest and the only way to quiet them is to let them stare at their phones and ignore the world around them, which includes me. Since I can’t bear to be the ignored taxi driver, I usually take the verbal battles, but I’m weary as we reach the school campus.

As I pull in, I fall in line with the other moms.  I tell my kids to have the best day ever and please do their best work. They look cute again and innocent as they get out of the car with their giant backpacks. They usually smile and wave.  I treasure this. Then, I spy ‘cutter mom’ pushing her way in and ‘trapper mom’ not letting anyone exit after the drop off. The first week we all expect chaos as we try and understand the rules. But by week four, please do not drive, staring straight ahead, sipping your coffee, pretending you have no idea there is any protocol.

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We can’t do anything about the traffic and morning routine chaos, but we can follow simple etiquette to make things move more smoothly on campus. It helps all of our moods too. I don’t want to caffeinate a bad mood!