21 Things Every Person With a New Baby Is Guilty Of According to Mike Spohr

   After having your first baby, there are certain behaviors that almost every new mom and dad catch themselves doing. Sometimes, new parents don’t even know that they are doing these things but Mike Spohr happily points them out with a humorous list of 21 things all parents with a new baby are guilty of doing. Scroll below to read the Buzzfeed staff writer’s list that almost every parent can relate to!

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books

1. Trusting some family members more than others to hold your baby

2. Trying to channel your inner photographer and take “artsy” pictures of your baby’s toes and fingers

 3. Poking your baby to make sure they’re still breathing and then pretending it wasn’t you who woke the baby

 4. Taking a while to feel 100% confident when carrying the baby from place to place

 5. Breaking all your social media rules you promised yourself you wouldn’t do before giving birth. You want to post another picture of the baby so bad you can’t resist but you hate yourself for it.

 6. Thinking that your baby has an amazing personality and is smiling at you when they are actually just really gassy

 7. Having those “I can’t do this” meltdowns 

8. Using your baby as an excuse for everything, like not texting back when you really were just on candy crush or playing trivia crack

9. Taking very long baths or showers when you get the rare opportunities 

10. Secretly thinking your baby is the cutest one in the room

 11. Panicking when someone in public sneezes or coughs near your baby

 12. Fantasizing about all the things you are going to do with your baby way in the future

 13. Having to suppress the urge to freak out at people who ask you how much sleep you’ve been getting

 14. Already judging other parents and their kids

 15. Talking about who your baby looks like even though it’s way too early to tell

 16. Really wishing that umbilical stump would just fall off already

 17. Constantly being worried about your baby’s soft spot

18. Tuning out on the advice you’ve already been given 10 times before

 19. Being terrified to cut your baby’s nails

 20. Trying to act much more in control of the situation than you really feel at your baby’s first appointment with the pediatrician 

21. And of course, loving the heck out of your baby more than you knew was possible

ONCEKids Publishing is run by literacy advocate and Mompreneur Eileen Wacker.  Click here to find her acclaimed books